Day 1: 

This Whole30 is going to be SO easy! I love the thought of having omelets for breakfast every day.

Days 2 to 3:

How can I feel this hungover without having had any alcohol?

Days 4 to 5:

Don’t eat a donut in front of me. I will punch you. Don’t say the wrong thing to me. I will kick you. Don’t breathe in front of me. I will kill all thing things.

Days 6 to 7:

Can I just hibernate through the next 24 days?

Days 8 to 9:

Why do my pants feel tighter?!! Wasn’t I supposed to lose weight from this Whole30?!!

Days 10 to 11:

Eff this. All I want to do is eat a cheeseburger.

Days 12 to 15:

Cookies and french fries are haunting my dreams, and my cravings feel worse than a pregnant woman’s.

Days 16 to 27:

So this is what Tiger Blood feels like! I’ve magically become faster and stronger than ever before! I’m invincible!!!

Day 21:

If I have to eat one more egg, I’m going to lose it.

Days 22 to 25:

But I really just want to weigh myself…

Day 28:

I can just end my Whole30 early, right? It’s not like anyone will know…

Days 29 and 30:

OMG, I freaking did it!!! I feel so free I don’t know what to do with myself!

Day 31:

This BAMF deserves a glass of wine.